urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:insane_elephant Erin Erin 2005-11-06T17:41:25Z urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:insane_elephant:20530 2005-11-06T17:39:29Z 2005-11-06T17:41:25Z Crime and Punishment:<br /><br /><br />Raskolnikov’s burning and intent gaze seemed to keep growing stronger, pierced into his consciousness and into his soul. All of a sudden Razumikhin shuddered. Something strange seemed to have passed between them… an idea had slipped through, a kind of hint; something terrible, hideous, suddenly understood on both sides… Razumikhin turned pale as a corpse.<br /> ‘Now do you understand?’ Raskolnikov said suddenly… (300) urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:insane_elephant:20285 2005-06-30T20:40:51Z 2005-06-30T20:40:51Z 1)This week i have to cat-sit for my neighbors. I hate cleaning litter boxes! The worst part is that one of the cats is 18 and has cancer. She might die in my care. She was such a sweet kitty too. <br /><br />2)Work started Tuesday. I am a trip counsellor for a camp of 5-7 year olds. I was surprised at how good they are! There is one boy named Mitchell who is soo cute. Now if he could just learn to keep his hands to himself!<br /><br />3)Wendsday I went to see my ear doctor, and i have returned with good news! After years of ear infections, skin cists that threated to cause brain damage, and four surgeries withen the last five years, my ear is finnaly healed! My hearing has returned and I can now swim under water. <br /><br />4) The bad news of this day was that I found out a math teacher at my school died. He had cancer and had been fighting it all year long. Not only was he a great math teacher, but he has little children that go to my dance studio. I can't imagin what the family is going through right now. So many good people that i've know have died from cancer. My grammy, my firends 12 year old sister... the list goes on. It always seems to be the nicest people that fall victum to it. <br /><br />Hopfully tonights art class can cheer me up:) urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:insane_elephant:20192 2005-06-27T17:09:50Z 2005-06-27T17:09:50Z Recent highlights:<br /><br />1) June 23d was the Modest Mouse concert. It was awesome, but being alone with only one other friend outside of the State theatre at midnight was not. Sketchy guys in vans gave us strange looks...<br /><br />2) I went to PortCon Saturday night for the dance thingy. Peter and Tim are officially my heros! <br /><br />3) I start my first job tomarow! I'm a trip counselor for one of the camps so i get to go to the beach with a bunch of little kids. It doesn't pay that well though.<br /><br />4) I made a new friend! I need more friends outside of school... urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:insane_elephant:19911 2005-06-27T16:34:05Z 2005-06-27T16:34:05Z ... it's still here! its still working! *hugs journal* I shall never abandon you again!!!!!!!! <br /><br />List of evils:<br />1)dots<br />2)pop up ads<br />3)my inability to spell(i apologize for that)<br />4)standardized testing urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:insane_elephant:19595 2004-09-28T22:49:49Z 2004-09-28T22:49:49Z ... I thought i was a geek. Now i am not so sure. Oh well. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:insane_elephant:19455 2004-03-22T19:59:13Z 2004-03-22T20:01:46Z I want to be alone<br />just to sit and dream of home<br />a place i've never been<br />a place i've only drempt<br /><br />and i want them all to go<br />and i want them to leave me alone<br />except for one i see<br />to stay while i bleed<br /><br />a face my fingures cannot touch<br />yet my arms must embrace<br />just someone to understand <br />and put a smile on my face<br /><br />and so i sit still<br />this place a faceless face<br />just wanting to be heard <br />a cry for help, a flightless bird<br /><br />but i fly on invisible wings<br />unable to touch thoses things<br />sitting in my place<br />looking out at all the space<br />-3/21/04 urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:insane_elephant:18966 2004-03-22T01:12:04Z 2004-03-22T01:12:04Z durring these quiet hours <br />i close my heavy eyes <br />just to block out all the world <br />their prying eyes <br /><br />from their gaze i hide <br />they who do not see me <br />from their words i hide <br />their thoughts annoy me <br /><br />and i wonder ot myself <br />i am smart and i am kind <br />my blue eyes sparkle <br />i am never left behind <br /><br />so why am i sad, why so alone? <br />where is my confidence, <br />my guide to peace thus known <br /><br />and my restless soul now quivers <br />with every unshed tear <br />for which i have no reasons <br />just this that's insecure. <br />-3/20/04 MP urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:insane_elephant:18765 2004-02-27T00:32:05Z 2004-02-27T00:32:05Z So, today in study hall between writing bored all over the paper I suddenly realized how boreing my life was... This was a problem. I then relized that even though I went to a christain camp last summer I met someone who had almost died several times in gang fights. I got a detailed discription of each and even got to see the scars. I also got to meet someone who ended up going through withdrawl (Yeah I can't spell. I blame this on my elementary teachers). Anyways, it wasn't pretty. This lead me to relize that who needs an exciting life when you get to watch everyone else go through it? (The guys from our group went streaking too. Of all the palces, at the christain camp i probably had my most unchristian expeariences...) urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:insane_elephant:18460 2004-01-31T18:42:07Z 2004-01-31T18:42:07Z the sounds! they're so sharp and clear, and it will only get better! No more surgeries! I might even be able to swim under water again! urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:insane_elephant:18394 2004-01-06T20:18:19Z 2004-01-06T20:18:19Z It was yesterday, monday, and today i feel really icky. I'm suprised i even feel well enough to complain about it. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:insane_elephant:18069 2003-12-08T01:23:01Z 2003-12-08T01:23:01Z Yes, I lost it. It's gone. Lost and never to be found. I don't know why i still care, but i do. Life is just like that i guess. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:insane_elephant:17867 2003-12-06T16:31:14Z 2003-12-06T16:31:14Z IT IS SNOWING! It's not that cold though. I hope it doesn't crust over, and that we can going sking tomarow. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:insane_elephant:17475 2003-12-05T20:21:11Z 2003-12-05T20:21:11Z it was like 8 degrees outside this morning, and there's supposed to be a snow storm this weekend! SNOW! A FOOT OF SNOW! JOY! i'm going to go sking and, and... SNOW! tis the first storm of the season! FLUFFY SNOW! urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:insane_elephant:17197 2003-11-23T01:35:58Z 2003-11-23T01:35:58Z Funny, when there is a really good thing worth putting in this journal, i am to busy enjoying it to put it in the journal. When i am down, and it is something worth putting in this journal, i write about it so i can stop thinking about it. The world must see me as a pretty depressing person. WELL I'M NOT! Life is good, i have a book to read, i got all a's again... and I am bored. (couldn't help but put the negative thingy in...you know, keeping things consistant) urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:insane_elephant:17089 2003-11-10T02:31:20Z 2003-11-10T02:31:20Z ... this may sound like i'm just complaning, but my thoughts go deeper than that. I wish that people could understand me. I mean more like if they could see how i thought, and who i really was without making judgments about me. People think i am shy and boring but i just don't talk a lot. I wish there were a way to express concepts, or that there was a mutuall understanding between certain people that did not require oral communication. Half the time i want to say something, the english language causes others to interpert it differently. I make no sence. I'm a listener, not a talker...<br /> I need to my myself a listener. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:insane_elephant:16800 2003-11-04T23:45:24Z 2003-11-04T23:45:24Z Mha ha ha ha ha! Run from me! Now that i have your attention, i have nothing important to say... Except i'm getting a 98 in spanish! Take that grammer! speaking of grammer anyone want to explain the difference between a preposition and a conjunction? I'm getting all a's and i don't know my parts of speech! urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:insane_elephant:16604 2003-10-17T19:45:46Z 2003-10-17T19:45:46Z I get to have another... yes! that's right, ear surgery! I'm not just talking tubes here, I mean extensive reconstructive ear surgery! Nothing seems to be going my way, i am in need of an uplifting momment. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:insane_elephant:16271 2003-09-22T00:35:43Z 2003-09-22T00:35:43Z Mabey my feelings are invisable... so that everyone thinks they can walk all over me or something. Mabey I should just sit in a corner or something. Life is so fustrating. I can't even spell fustrating! Then there are the happy things when I make someone feel better. <br /> I got my permit yeasterday, and I also went driving. I almost got into an accident, after passing a tractor on a very busy high way. Of course it only happened when I was driving in a standard for the very first time. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:insane_elephant:16025 2003-09-01T17:50:18Z 2003-09-01T17:50:18Z I drove at 65 mph today, and I parallel parked! Four more hours of driving and I can get my permit! urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:insane_elephant:15762 2003-08-26T16:33:59Z 2003-08-26T16:33:59Z I feel like crap! Anyways, I get to drive again Thursday. I am so sick of doing the same lazy things that I am actually happy that school is starting soon. Also, I have to drive down to Boston to have my ear checked out again. I guess I have another sist growing in there again. If that's the case, it will be four operations and counting. People don't realise how much this ear has taken away from me. Between that and my allegies I can't have a life. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:insane_elephant:15452 2003-08-25T17:14:13Z 2003-08-25T17:14:13Z School starts in about a week...<br><font size="1">run little 9th graders run! mha ha ha ha ha! except poor Jessie and Gabbie!</font> urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:insane_elephant:15172 2003-08-14T17:26:53Z 2003-08-14T17:26:53Z I just made 15 dollars for baby sitting one 5 year old for 2 and a half hours. I love my neighbors! As for my life... Drivers ed is so boring! How can people stand it? I usually am the one always paying attention and stuff, but this is worse than watching sponge bob (no offence) for two hours! urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:insane_elephant:14925 2003-08-09T15:31:59Z 2003-08-09T15:33:01Z ... yesterday the worst possible thing happened while I was baby sitting. I was cooking bacon on the stove when it began to rain. The kid I was baby sitting thought we should bring in the laundry. Since we were only going to be out there for a minute i turned the stove on low and went out. We decided it was raining to hard and went to go back inside only to discover we had been locked out. There was no way we could get in and bacon was still cooking on the stove! Lucky for us, the neighbor ran a daycare and was home. We managed to call the boys father who tried to reach the boy's mom. So we went back to the house. 15 minutes later the neighbor came over and told us they couldn't get the mom. The father would have to drive an hour from work to let us in before the house burned down! So for an hour we waited in the rain while look through the window to make sure the bacon didn't catch fire. The worst part was that right in front of us when we looked in the door way we could see two house keys hanging there. Why me? whyyyyy?!? urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:insane_elephant:14812 2003-07-18T20:21:26Z 2003-07-18T20:21:26Z Five hour tennis camp for five days in a row... It's finally over! It wasn't bad, but the pain! The pain! On a lighter note... My skills have improved greatly, and i had no asthma trouble. True the camp was indoors with air conditioning, but i could breathe! urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:insane_elephant:14555 2003-07-09T21:37:09Z 2003-07-09T21:37:09Z I went to see the allergy specialist, and it turns out that i need more asthma medication stuff. I might end up useing two inhalers and a pill thingy! Most likely just the two inhalers though.